[00:00:00] Speaker A: Welcome to Spanish Janice. I'm Janice Burt and today we're diving into conversations that inspire growth, connection and confidence. You're watching now Media Television. Welcome mis amigos, to Spanish Janice where we have real, honest conversations that help us grow in business and leadership and in life. I am your host, Janice Burt and today we are joined by Jesse Hansen and a clinical psychologist, somatic psychology and neuropsychology specialist and trauma reprocessing expert with over 25 years of experience.
His work beautifully bridges ancient wisdom with modern science and it helps people heal by reconnecting mind, body and spirit. He works with a lot of leaders, entrepreneurs, people around the world who carry a lot of responsibility, responsibility and often they carry that quietly. So he understands what it means to be like the strong person, the person everyone leans on, but how that strength can sometimes come at a personal cost.
And we're going to start with a conversation today that you might recognize. And it's what happens when you are always so strong for others but, but you feel overwhelmed inside.
So Jesse, thank you so much for being with me and our viewers today.
[00:01:35] Speaker B: Janice, thank you so much for having me and honored to be here and thank you so much for caring about the world of somatics as I, I've been on this path over 25 years now and I was know for many, many years. I was the, the weirdo, the oddball, even, even in Southern California where I lived at the time. So that's saying a lot. But I think I was really just in some ways ahead of the times because now neuroscience, neuropsychology, the, the mind body connection is becoming, you know, more and more a thing. And so I'm really grateful that you know, you, you are open to that and I'm grateful for this conversation.
In terms of your, your initial question there. Yeah, I think the first thing that came up when you were asking it was I just heard the word balance and boundaries as a beginning answer to that topic you're bringing up, which is that so often, I mean even, and part of what I'm working on now is reframing leadership isn't just corporate CEOs or people that run companies, how we lead our families, how we lead our communities, even how we lead ourselves, all these things play in and in all of those different arenas especially I think it is highlighted when you are running a large corporation or large business with a lot of people, this matters even more and I think it matters to all of us in our life. But is that balance between self agency and other agency, what is an agent. Right? We hire a real estate agent, we hire a booking agent. Agents get things done for us, which is great. But if we're spending most of our life in agency for others and not having any self agency for a while, everyone likes us and loves us because we're Superman, Superwoman. We're getting everything done for everyone but secretly inside we are often hurting and we've lost that balance by not setting boundaries. And I can humbly admit I am preaching to. I am the choir and the preacher here.
My own dance in my life as I hear myself talk that know just how. It's a continual dance of, of learning that balance of where to say yes and where to say no. You know.
[00:03:41] Speaker A: So Jesse, I, I knew we were going to get along fabulously.
My one tattoo here says balance because I possibly like you, I'm a recovering people pleaser and just really reclaiming our, our lives. And I love how you talked about agency. How have you done that in your own life to set those boundaries, to develop that personal agency?
[00:04:15] Speaker B: Yeah, in my, in my nerdy psychobabble language we, we would call agency the act of being an agent for others and self agency being an agent for self. So that's the language I'm going to use.
So let's talk about first how, how I became a super agent and AKA people pleaser was because of, you know, like any of us, it's our family of origin, the roles that we take on firstborn child already that's going to set up the paradigm for agency to be birthed. And then a younger sister who had a lot of needs and took a lot of care from my parents. So I learned very young to be the good boy, to be less of a problem to, you know. And I quickly translated even by kindergarten, maybe not kindergarten, but first, second, third grades to be like oh wow, yeah, Jesse's such a nice guy, such a kind guy. And by the time I was in college, oftentimes people called me Mr. Nice Guy. And I felt like a friend to every, an acquaintance to everyone, but really a friend to almost no one.
And so this pattern of agency for me goes back so far and for so long I thought it was great. I thought I was the best guy ever because I was always there for everyone and all this. And it wasn't until my early 20s where I had my own dance and bout with substance abuse and high levels of dissociation combined with my father was dying. It was like the perfect storm of all of it coming to the surface. And that's When I think I first realized, wow, I have no self agency. I don't have a clue how to speak up for myself, how to stick up for myself, how to have my own back. And thus began my awakening, roughly 23 years old in Southern California. And that's when I first started to learn about it. And for me personally, it was a mixture of certain practical things, Janice, just of like, oh, yeah, I got to remember to breathe. I got to remember to really check in to see, you know, one. One of the concepts in somatic psychology is called the wisdom of the body. And here's a quick, simple, easy example that hopefully a lot of the viewers can relate to is that, you know, hey, do you want to. Honey, I want to go out to dinner with our friends tonight. And as that question comes, it's just a dinner, like, who cares, right? But if I listen to my body and I'm like, actually what I really feel inside is I was wanting to just spend time with you tonight and go home and snuggle and watch a movie. But the old Jesse or anyone that's in agency would just be like, yes, dear, yes, honey, okay. And then I go, but I'm secretly resentful and I'm not fully present and I'm thinking about what I wish I was really doing.
That's a micro example. Obviously there are bigger examples in mine and other people's lives that have higher, higher consequences, but it's that, that in the moment being able to listen and maybe you call it the little voice, right? Of like, ah, but the little voice is telling me I just, even though it doesn't make sense, I'm going to go with that. So that's one element I would say is sort of like more practical skills, techniques, coping mechanisms almost.
And the other, which is the deepest, which is the, the somatic work, meaning looking at the deeper neurological programs that got imprin me as a young boy around, you know, ultimately what consciously it looks like Jesse's a good guy. Jesse's helping out everyone unconsciously. The voice inside is saying, well, I'm only good, valuable and loved if I'm saving someone else, right?
So that, that unweaving of that piece is the deeper work that takes some, admittedly some time, energy and focus for any of us to rewrite it. And even today I'm in now 46, almost 47, and I, I still on the daily. I have to still remember these things and practice these things and check in with. Am I actually saying no when I meet, when I want to say no. Or did I just say yes again?
[00:08:08] Speaker A: You know what, what are some of the ways to check in with ourselves?
What do you use to like really be intentional and check in with the body, with the mind, with the spirit? Is there anything specific that you do?
[00:08:30] Speaker B: Absolutely. There. There's a lot of, a lot of little things I would say that add up one of the simplest ones. I actually just went over this on, on a, an episode not too long ago around this construct of a map of consciousness, a map of understanding ourselves through a somewhat intentionally now I'll call it funny but playful approach to deep and sometimes difficult things is called the eagle. Like the bird Aguila shepherd and the crazy kids. And so the eagle is the third eye, the, the more powerful part of our brain, the, the God's eye vision, whatever you want to call it, being able to zoom out. The shepherd is the version of us we can see in our little digital boxes here. The, the everyday human, the part of us that makes choices every day about what we say, how we breathe, what we put in us, who we talk to, who we connect with. And the crazy kids, of course, as they say, as they sound, you know, they are all of our previous neural imprints. They're everything that has happened to us up until the present moment, for better or for worse.
And so that model, and that's a super simplified version of it, I have other stuff out there that deepens into that, but that model has helped me and so many people have that moment to moment skill to be able to track. Oh yeah, wait, that's my old people pleasing agent part.
Do I really want to keep living that out? Do I really want to keep being that, that person?
And through the inner work as well as these kind of like frameworks, I can see where people start to make different choices, myself included. And the last quick little one, Janice, is that this is so simple and I annoy people all the time out of this, especially if they, if they're willingly allowing me to. But as I call it, it's just simple, but it's called soft.
And it's the realization that as we were programmed by creators source codes, our jawbone is not meant to be tight as a de facto setting. And yet almost every human I know, especially North Americans, that's what they think is normal is we're just sitting here like this. The de facto setting. If this is the jaw, it's just this, it's just a tiny little space. I don't know that's going to come up. But I'm Talking about a millimeter, where when we relax the jawbone, what that does is it releases pressure in the temporomandibular joint. It allows cerebral spinal fluid to start to move through the mind and body or to create brain heart coherence, which thereby helps us live more through our emotional intelligence instead of only our figure it out analyzer. Do the right thing, which is where the people pleaser comes from, right? It's all. It's a mental, I've got an idea that if I don't do this, they won't love me anymore or I'm bad.
It's all mental. The body's already saying, I'm tired. I just want to go home. Like, no, I'm not going to dinner, right?
[00:11:16] Speaker A: I love how you just said that about the jaw because literally you said that and I was like, man, I am. I'm like clenching my jaw. And you just, as I released, just opened up a little bit and softened.
It was. It was just a whole different kind of body experience.
And so I love stuff like that. Just the practical, like, what are the little things that we can do that we do them enough, they add up and make the world of difference in our lives.
And when we come back, we're going to break, but when we come back, we are going to talk about that beautiful backdrop behind you and you're gonna tell us where you are and how you got there. So everybody stay with us. We'll be right back with more insight, inspiration, and real conversations. This is Spanish Janice on NOW Media Television. And we're back. I'm Janice Burt, and you're watching Spanish Janice. Let's keep growing together.
Welcome back, everybody, to span Spanish Janice. Do you want more of what you're watching? Stay connected to Spanish Janice and every NOW Media TV favorite live or on demand, anytime you like. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and unlock get this nonstop bilingual programming in English and Spanish. If you're on the move, you can also catch the podcast version or right from our
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we have business, news, lifestyle culture. Now Media TV is streaming around the clock. Ready whenever you are. Welcome back to Spanish Janice. I am here with Jesse Hansen and we are going to continue this lovely conversation by asking Jesse, is this a backdrop, a virtual backdrop that you have there or. Or is the. Are these actual beautiful green trees behind you? Where are you, Jesse?
[00:13:30] Speaker B: Thank you for appreciating and noticing. Believe it or not, it is an actual backdrop. And I am coming to you from a place where Spanish is quite popular. And I am getting there.
So I am down here in Costa Rica and I'm up the top of a Mountain about 30 minutes from a cute little beach city called Uvita.
And I've been down here five years now with my family as part of, from our first segment there, you know, me listening to my body, you know, it made no sense at the time I moved here, I had a full private practice. I, you know, completed the North American dream, got my doctorate, have my practice doing the thing, working on any TV show. And I came down here to source out a retreat center for a Canadian company and I just fell in love with the land and I got back home and within eight weeks I just made the biggest leap of faith of my life. The biggest act of walking my talk and practicing what I preach. Because I'm always telling people to lead with heart, follow your heart.
And yet I'm not maybe 20s, Jesse, Southern California, fully, I would have been that woo, woo or whatever. But now, thankfully, in my 40s, I've gotten my left brain online as well, which means I say go through my heart and then check it out with my head and make sure that it makes sense, you know, make sure I, I sold, you know, I sold my whole life up north. That's what gave me the, the financial power to actually move down here and do it. So it wasn't just, you know, running and sleeping on the beach.
That being said, Janice, it was, it has been the most beautiful leap of faith of my life and it's continued to bring such blessings to me and my family. And of course, you know, life continues and there's always challenges and yet that's how we grow.
So I've been here five years now and I basically am dedicating my path down here, I mean, wherever I am, but to bridging ancient wisdom and modern science. And there's so much ancient wisdom here between the energy of the land, the animals, the culture of the people, and where I live more in the southwest part, oh my goodness, literally right now, as I'm speaking this, there are a family of monkeys walking about 30ft from me.
So they know what's up, they're hearing it.
But just, yeah, the way that we learn from, from the land and, and Ticos is the respectful way to refer to Costa Ricans. The Ticos teach me so much with their simpler lifestyle and, you know, more peace, more happiness. So I am here in Costa Rica, I love it. And you'll have to come visit.
[00:15:57] Speaker A: Oh, do not say that, Jesse. I will be knocking on your door tomorrow. No, I actually did go to Costa Rica. When was that? Maybe two years ago.
And did absolutely love it.
I've always been tempted to buy something either in Mexico or somewhere. And when I went to Costa Rica, I even had that thought like, wow, this would be an amazing place to buy a little home and, and live there.
But talk to us. I really want to figure out this. Listening to heart, listening to that still small voice within us and leading from that place.
How did you learn how to do that? How do you teach people how to do that? What does that look like?
[00:16:54] Speaker B: Let's polish a little semantics. Say, first of all, how am I learning? I'm not done.
Still learning. Second of all, yeah, you said, I want to figure out this whole, like, living in the heart thing. Ironically, you know, it's. It's less about figuring out and being shown or earning it. And so. So first I'll just start by saying that, you know, I've worked. I have my own dance and background with substance abuse. I've worked with thousands of clients from Passages, Malibu to A and E to all these places, with people moving through what's commonly called addiction and recovery. I believe in those constructs, and I'm trained in them. However, I also believe that no matter what our challenges are, we're all going through the same process of being a human and having a life and moving through our lifespan is the process of awakening. And so whether I'm working with myself or people that are high functioning, that have never touched a drug, or whether I'm pulling people out of a ditch on interventions, it's the same journey of having to make peace between the mind and the heart.
And all of us have different stories, different origins, different traumas, and yet that journey is very similar. And so what I've seen there are definitely the elements of. We touched on it a little bit. The soft jaw technique.
Our viewers may not be aware, the jawbone called the mandible, roughly shaped like this, is also the same shape of the pubis bone down in our hips and at our roots. And they are in deep communication all the time. They're interconnected neurologically, spiritually, psychologically. So the other one is soft knees. By softening our knees just a little bit, gives the pelvis more freedom, more. More looseness. And that translates over to our consciousness whenever we are stuck in our head. And since I have done all this work with addiction, I'm going to take the blessings to make a joke, hopefully not offend anyone. But I often Call most North American people, myself included as well as, especially when I work the high functioning people who are, you know, very type A you could call it. But I, I say you are, are left brain junkies. You're just addicted to that left brain. You want to just think and figure out everything.
And you mentioned it, you didn't quite use the word, but I felt it in your, in your language there, Janice. When you let your jaw soften, you felt a little bit more surrendered to the moment. And that's what I would say if I can simplify it. How do I start to live in my heart? I have to learn how to surrender.
I have to learn how to not get trapped in the illusion that I can control things.
Now I can influence a lot, but I actually cannot control anything, especially not other people or other traffic jams or anything like that.
And so I think that essence of surrender, there's a number more I could go on for too long with somatic clues and ways that you kind of work in your body to create that. But ultimately it's really, is the deepest part of it is if you really, we really want to live in our heart, we have to do some interpersonal work around how did we stop living in our heart in the first place? Because that is where we all start. That's how God created us. That's how a non traumatized young child will live, you know, is fully through the heart, through the body. And so that looks different for each person. But that's, that's what I see is really. And that's what I've been dedicated to that everything I do now as a psychologist and healer is all stuff that I've put myself through for the last 25 years. And I think that's the key element of it and that's my love of ancient wisdom. It's all ancient ceremonies, whether they involve plant sacraments or whether they involve dancing or meditation, stillness. Tons of different roads to Rome here. But the themes that are same is learn how to surrender, learn how to have faith, learn how to soften your jaw, learn how to trust. And for me, faith does not have to be in a religious discussion discipline or deity. It can be and that's great.
Faith simply means I have faith that there's a greater power that is somehow supporting all of this. Even when things seem like they're falling apart, they can be falling into place, but our ego doesn't see that yet.
[00:21:01] Speaker A: I love this. Jesse, I have a quick story to share about surrender because as soon as you said that I Was transported back to. It was deeply spiritual experience for me. I don't know how everybody else in the audience felt, but I was speaking on a big stage, a lot of CEOs, professional speakers in the audience. I stood up there, started talking. About a minute in, I start shaking really badly, which my nervous system, just completely out of whack.
That's happened to me before speaking, but this time was, I mean, legit. Couldn't stand up, nothing to hold on to, no chair to sit on.
I was like, in my head going, I could either run off the stage or I need to just solidify myself somehow. And so I just dropped to my knees on this huge stage and I spoke from my knees and just said, you know what?
Life is so much better on the other side of our fears. And I know for a fact people in that audience were going, well, woman, like, what you're doing right now, that's like my top fear. Okay? So maybe if. If that's going on, I might be okay. And it felt so deeply spiritual to me because it was a place of complete surrender. I don't even know what words I really spoke at that point, but it just reminded me, you know, Janice, you're the vessel. You're.
And just speak from your heart. Be in that moment and accept that present moment as it is.
So I don't know if you have any stories that you would like to share your moments of surrender, but I thought I'd share that with you.
[00:22:56] Speaker B: Such a beautiful share. Thanks for. Thanks for being vulnerable there. And that's so beautiful. I'll quickly reflect on that, and I can offer a quick one as well of my own. But is that. Feel that moment of what we were just saying, Janice, your head was going crazy. What are they thinking?
The process of the head creating the quivers and the anxiety in the body. And then as soon as you listen to your body, instead of just fought it, you know, your head would have just kept looping forever. You surrendered. You listened to, what does my body need right now? It just.
I'm quivering. I need to go down.
And how beautiful. That, too. I got an image as you were speaking.
That's how we show reverence.
That's how we show prayer in a lot of rituals is literally getting down.
So to me, that is so beautiful. And I so resonate with what you said of, like, when we know how to be surrendered and more humble and okay to just present on our knees in front of a big audience.
That, to me, is, you know, that that is the embodiment of surrender. And that's the practice of, of really leading with your heart. You know, you let, you let your body and your heart lead in that moment.
And so it recentered you, right? Had you run, had you run, you would have been ashamed and you would have been, you know, whatever other stories would have come with that. The choice you made was so beautiful. So I love that. And I know we just got a moment, so I'll quickly reciprocate and just say, yeah, for me, I mean, honestly, I feel like I practice it every day. I have four young children under 10, and so there is so much surrender involved just in my. From 5am to 8am, getting the kids out of the door, you know, in terms of like, okay, can't control that. Let it go. Breathe. Here we go. Let's get this done.
There's much deeper ones than that, obviously, but I feel like that's a great example just in terms of realizing when we say surrender here, Janice, it doesn't have to be spending your whole day laying in a hammock. That's not really what I mean by surrender. It means letting go of the idea that we can control it. All right? Because the mind and the head is trying to figure it out and analyze and create an outcome. The body is just here being right.
[00:25:02] Speaker A: And I love that saying, you know, we make our plans and God laughs. I think that's just hilarious.
And with that, we will be right back. Stay tuned, everybody. We'll be right back with more insight, inspiration, and real conversations. This is Spanish Janice on NOW Media Television. And we're back. I'm Janice Burt, and you're watching Spanish Janice. Let's keep growing together.
Welcome back, mis amigos, to Spanish Janice. We are continuing our conversation with the amazing, the remarkable Jesse Hansen. Jesse, I had an experience with hypnotherapy that I would say really transformed my life.
And so hypnotherapy to me I hold very dear. I've also done talk therapy, I've done NeuroFeedback, I've done EMDR, regular cognitive behavioral therapy and all of that.
But I really want to focus on hypnotherapy.
First of all, can you tell everybody what that is in a nutshell? And then also the benefits of that type of therapy.
[00:26:25] Speaker B: Yeah, grateful. Grateful to talk about this stuff. I think it's so important to help educate people because I think there's so many misconceptions of hypnotherapy. Is it? Woo woo. Are you going to make me cluck like a chicken? All these things. I. I have worked with many hypnotherapists in multi, multidisciplinary teams over the years, and. And here's what I have, Janice, is that I feel like what. What we're learning when we bring in the modern science, especially neuroscience, with the ancient wisdom, is that creating theta brainwave consciousness, the theta brainwave states, or hypnagogic states of consciousness, is where neuroplasticity is the highest. Broken down simply, if we really want to get some deeper work done on ourselves, and we don't want to spend 20 years in talk therapy doing it, learning how to consciously reprogram our nerve is the ticket. And hypnotherapy is a wonderful vehicle, not so much necessarily because of hypnosis, but because of creating altered states of consciousness intentionally. And human beings have been chasing and wanting and creating altered states of consciousness since the beginning of time. Time. We're facing a time on the planet right now where psychedelics are making a huge renaissance, a huge revolution, partly because they help us create altered states of consciousness where we can do deeper healing work in our unconscious, rather than just our conscious mind saying, well, I know cigarettes, but, you know, to stop smoking.
What's happening is those hypnagogic states are helping reprogram the unconscious part of us where that drive to soothe, you know, you can feel. It's almost like a. A binky of sorts. Usually there's some younger trauma where we have, you know, haven't gotten enough needs met, and so we want something in our mouth all the time.
But basically, in. In a nutshell, I would say I'm so happy you've done all this work and the hypnosis. And that's a lot of the work I do, though I'm not. I don't call myself a hypnotherapist. The main work I do is when I can help them learn how to access hypnagogic states and address certain challenges, traumas, problems from that place.
[00:28:37] Speaker A: Yes. And for me, the reason it was so impactful is it was the first time where I actually went in. It felt like to my subconscious, to those deeper beliefs that I held and emotions. And it's where I actually saw fear, basically controlling my entire being. I saw the fear. I felt the fear. And then my hypnotherapist, she gave me the opportunity to picture this clear balloon, to put all the fear inside of that and to watch it float away.
And so just on a subconscious level, I was like, oh, it consciously, I realized I'm Living in fear. And I don't need to do that anymore. I can actually create a safe place.
But talk to us a little bit about the somatic part. Somatic breathwork and healing. What is that? What does that look like? How do we access that?
[00:29:41] Speaker B: That.
Yeah, well, well said, Janice. And I, I actually from, from Dr. Jesse say there's three layers of processing that a human needs to do to, to fully clear, reprogram or heal from whatever the event is. The first one is cognitive and it's talk therapy, it's cbt, dbt, all those elements, they have their place. And it's the, it's Landmark Forum, for example, works highly with narrative and story. And if we don't do that, we're not going to get through the rest. So that's a great place to start. The second part is where hypnotherapy and hypnagogic states enter, which is more what I would say is like almost working with our own psyche, working with the intrapsychic elements of self. And from a little bit more spiritual lens that I could say that's where we work on the spirit plane. Or like the balloon you gave, right? That was not a real balloon, but it felt real and it had meaning. And so we work with imagery and we remember that the imaginal brain responds the exact same neurochemically as the experiential brain.
Dreams are a great example. You're not really falling off a waterfall, but it feels like you are, so you wake up, right? The body responds the same. That's why hypnotherapy works. That's why the NLP neuro linguistic reprogramming works. The last part and the part that I think is most overlooked and most skipped, not because people don't want to do it, because I think there's still just not a ton of practitioners that have been deeply trained in it. And there's not a ton of avenues out there in the mainstream world, especially through insurance providers that offer anything in somatics.
And so to use your balloon example, that's beautiful work, Janice. And that gets it at that. Two out of the three levels. The third level is looking at how has that fear been living in my body since I was born, or at least since as far back as I can remember. 3, 5, 7, whatever it is.
And you know, there's this process that's called sequencing. In psychology we call it sequencing and that means wow. Now I've identified not just the imagery of the fear, the balloon, taking it, but I've realized I've been holding my jawbone tight for three decades. Oh, my goodness. If I really want to deeper embody this new me, I've got to study and become aware. I call it. It's called structure. Structural psycho. Structural integration. It means for every great psychological shift, there needs to be a structural shift in how I hold my structure. What is our structure? It's bones. What is bones? Bones are held together by. Nice adjustment, neuromuscular patterns. Right. How we hold ourselves, our breath patterns, all of these things. One of my best teachers taught me that the unconscious mind is the body.
The body is holding all of the unconscious. The conscious mind is our electromagnetic frequency right about here in our prefrontal cortex. But the other 98% of us is the unconscious. And so by doing that somatic work, you, a person, can then earn full bi hemispheric reprogramming of whatever that trauma or relational challenge has been.
[00:32:46] Speaker A: Okay, so I have a question for you, Jesse, then.
So with this shaking that happens to me many times when I'm speaking in front of a group, what type of work do I need to do to really get at the root? It almost feels like there was a memory I have in high school of forgetting my lines during a speech competition.
And I don't know if I'm holding on to that or what that is, but the shaking, I'm like a 5050 that it's still going to happen when I stand up on the stage. So somatically, what do I need to do to release whatever I'm holding on to when it comes to speaking in front of groups?
[00:33:36] Speaker B: Yeah. Thank you for your vulnerability. That's so awesome.
You know, since you have a memory recall, one one simple way is called a float back. It's like, okay, I noticed the feeling of the shaking.
First of all, Dr. Peter Levine's work, if our viewers aren't familiar, Waking the Tiger is one of the best books you can read to understand everything Janice and I are talking about today. In that book, Levine describes and shows how shaking is actually that appropriate, is working to clear the trauma residue. Anytime an animal who does not have an ego doesn't care about what you think about him, he gets in a little squabble or whatever, and he goes right. They just shake it out and they clear their system right away. So first of all, the shaking is not a bad thing. However, it's not ideal when you're about to present.
So just acknowledging that the shaking is okay, it's intelligence working.
And yes, since you have a float Back where you can track that same feeling to a certain memory from childhood. That would be great to do either hypnosis, EMDR, sensory motor psychotherapy. There's at least 10 different modes you could implement there.
And always having to stay open. Here's the other thing is like, it's.
You think about it, that's a tough scenario. The other pieces that go even deeper into the unconscious is what was the emotional infrastructure of my family of origin?
Was I supported? And again, you can open as much or little as you want, but just saying like that would be something I'd be about is like, once that happened, did you have a family infrastructure where you could be.
But in a nutshell, yeah, there's. There's always an origin because originally programmed is called the polyvagal thumb. And we are, you know, we are calm, we're collected, we're able to just be present. It's when that part of our nervous system doesn't know how to go back online because of too much thinking. Yeah.
So it's a deep question. And I know we were short on time right now, so I will shut up. But just to say it's. It's the. The somatic work involves following into the body where that originally came from. Right. And then when that is cleared, you would be able to stand up in front of an audience and be like, I'm good. My legs are solid, you know.
[00:35:54] Speaker A: Well, it's interesting you mentioned that because at that speaking competition, it was the first one I had invited any friends or family to, because before I was kind of like, I want this just to my thing, you know, a little embarrassed, whatever. I'll just keep it under wraps. For me, this was the first time I invited people. And then I had that failure where I just forgot my lines. I lost the contest. And everybody was sitting there watching this and I think I just never processed.
And nobody ever talked to me about, you know, well, how do you feel now? And it just stayed so simple. Stuck. And like, I buried it. I buried it for so many years.
And when I started Speaking again about 13 years ago, I started. I decided to face my fears. And one of them was public speaking. And the minute I stood up there, just this violent shaking starts happening. And I'm like, what is going on?
So to your point, I know there's stuff with family and support and feeling really bad and not like anybody did anything wrong. They just maybe didn't know how to support me in that way. And I didn't know it would be a long standing thing forever. And ever.
[00:37:10] Speaker B: Not for, not forever and ever. Just, just until you do the work. But yes, up until now. And, and last quick thought on this is just say that you said something so important, Janice, which is that, you know, it was one thing that it happened. And obviously it does sound like the family pressures maybe amplify the pressure of being seen or wanting to do well. But the part where you didn't get a chance to talk to anyone about it or process it, that's the real damaging piece that you can, you can undo, you can rewire it. However, that would have been a game changer. And that's so often the case when I talk to people as adults, they're like, this awful thing happened and like no one even said, are you okay? Or help me process it. Then it gets locked in.
Rupture and repair. If we know how to do the repair work, we don't build trauma residue.
It's going to happen no matter what. It's the key of learning how to, to work through it. Ideally, sooner than later. Right?
[00:38:04] Speaker A: That's it. Sooner than later. And everybody stay tuned. We will be right back with Jesse. We'll be right back with more insight, inspiration and real conversations. This is Spanish Janice on NOW Media Television. And we're back. I'm Janice Burt and you're watching Spanish Janice. Let's keep growing together.
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Welcome back to Spanish Janice. I am with Jesse and Jesse, before we go any further, can you please tell people how they can find you? Because I know people are falling in love with you left and right and getting so many nuggets of wisdom.
So how can they find you, learn more about you?
[00:39:31] Speaker B: Thanks Janice. I would be loved to keep in touch with anyone that's interested. The easiest way to find me is at WWW. Hansen Healing.
Just my last name, H A N S O N then the word healing. I've also co founded mental health.com so you can find out more about what I'm doing there on mental health.com and lastly, I'm so grateful and Honored to be joining Janice and another amazing crew of now media hosts. I have my own show that just aired last week called Lead with Heart, so you can also find me there and check out further episodes as the weeks unfold.
[00:40:06] Speaker A: Beautiful. Oh, and this work that you're doing is just so important.
So just as a little side note, like, thank you for showing up in this way. We need healers. And it's, it's like, what good is our life when we just feel constantly like we're in this prison of fear, like we're a shell of ourselves?
So to be given some tools, to truly become the best versions of ourselves is so important.
And I want to talk, or I want to have you talk a little bit about our nervous system and what, what are some things we need to know about our nervous system? How do we need to care for it?
I know sleep is important to our nervous system, so just talk a little bit about that.
[00:41:01] Speaker B: Invitation to all the viewers as you listen to practice the soft jaw technique that I'm already annoying everyone about that. That is one of the simplest ways to start to reprogram our nervous system. And it's not that soft jaw is right and hard jaw is wrong. It's that most of us are unconsciously tight jawed. I call it muzzle mode. We're in muzzle mode all the time. So by preference of Janice's tattoo and the word balance, the rebalancing of muzzle mode is surrender mode or soft jaw. And it's not that it's better or right. It is the de facto or original program that we were given as children as to when we're at rest and calm, the jaw would just be. And I have a newborn now. He's just six weeks old. And sure enough, everything I've been studying is checking out, watching how his natural breathing is watching. He's just in wonder. And his jaw is just always soft. He has no reason to be stressed out right now, right? He's, he's sitting on, he's on a throne. His needs are met.
So that's one simple one. But I'll give a fun answer. I hope it's fun for anyone else. It's fun for me. Think of as classic psychologists. Forgive me here, but you know, we're, I'd like rather say a parfait than an onion, but we're some kind of layered beings that we are. And at the center or the source, we can call this soul or essence or beingness, connection, calm. This is all in us. This is all part of our program. We all have it somewhere in us. And in the nerdy language, that is referred to as the polyvagal nervous system. And so if you think of the first layer, what do we all get is polyvagal. Inside the womb, when we're created, zygote sperm come together to create the little fetus, that little sea monkey looking thing that eventually becomes us. That literally the tail of the sea monkey becomes the vagus nerve, which grows the brain and everything else. So, right, and think about that is like, literally we start from that and we just grow, grow, grow, grow, grow. All that's happening there, that's all polyvagal.
Then the next layer here becomes parasympathetic, which is the language that more people know about. And we're programmed to say that's rest and relax. It is, but it's a lot more than that. It has to do with our sense of calm and safety.
You mentioned. Right, with the fear and everything. And that's kind of a simplified battle that we're all in. Are we in fear or are we in love?
Safety. So parasympathetic is rest, relax, digest. However, it's also where we can move through our days. Even if there's a traffic jam, even when they're screaming kids, even when we're late for an episode of filming.
Soft jaw. It's gonna be okay. I don't know how, I don't know why.
Somehow it's gonna work out. That's this layer. And then as we keep developing and more things happen and we get older, the sympathetic nervous system becomes more primary. And that's the most superficial layer in this model. And that is fight or flight. That is stress. That is where most. There's tons of studies out there. You can look. The common North American brain and nervous system is stuck in sympathetic activity all the time.
Time, money, driving, like you said. How come we have to feel this way? It's because we have accepted a new cultural Gabor mate is the book of the book called the Myth of Normal. Normal is whatever we all agree it is. And so we've come to admit, yeah, normal is we ought to just be stressed out and maybe we get five minutes where we smoke some cannabis or drink some alcohol or whatever we do to unwind from that. But actually our truer states are the polyvagal and parasympathetic. And yet, like we've talked in the earlier segments, we have to do some work to reclaim those. And some of them are easy, simple, soft jaw, soft knees, deep breaths, daily affirmation, kind of things. But most of the reprogramming has to do with looking at where did I lose it? You know, how did I lose my Zen?
[00:45:03] Speaker A: Well, yes, and the beliefs that as children we start to form maybe other people's opinions of us or, you know, how we were treated or whatever. And then those beliefs, it feels like we all of a sudden accept them as our own and start operating kind of from that place. A lot of times of that not good enough.
I'm not good enough. I have to perform. I have to. People, please. In order to get validation, in order to get somebody to love me.
And I had a very interesting experience that I would love your input on.
I did a psychedelic breathing workshop just like three weeks ago.
And it's kind of where you breathe in and out, but kind of quickly. And I had the experience.
[00:46:00] Speaker B: Yeah, it's sometimes called, sometimes called holotropic breathing or psychedelic breathing. But yeah, I'm with you.
[00:46:08] Speaker A: Okay. So I had that, I did that and I had the experience of like my arms locking up and like my jaw locking up and not really being able to release it immediately. And I just, I slowered my. I, yeah, I lessened like how fast I was breathing, but I still was kind of locked up in my body.
Very, very interesting eye opening experience.
And it took a while for it to just my body to finally relax. And I remember just thinking to myself, just trust this process. Just surrender, you're safe, it's okay. Even though it was a very kind of disconcerting feeling to have my body so locked up. So what happened to me? What, what was that? Yeah.
[00:47:03] Speaker B: Ultimately you will be the best one to really translate exactly. But I can give you a sense from my own personal experience in guiding lots of others. You use the word psychedelic.
It's a huge buzzword.
It's like I mentioned earlier, it's coming back to life. Psychedelics create altered states of consciousness.
So can breath work. So can many other ways. There are many roads to roam. And what matters though, is getting into those altered states. And what you describe doesn't sound all that different than what some people might describe from a mushroom journey or ayahuasc journey or things like this. What's happening? If you remember that model I shared earlier, the shepherd, the one who's in the present moment, is choosing to breathe in a certain way that basically activates the sympathetic nervous system. Because of the short breath. Right? Short breath is sympathetic. Deep, long, slow breath is parasympathetic towards polyvagal. So by sort of being choosing and allowing Yourself to be forced to just keep, you know, doing the breathing. It activates the sympathetic system, which then brings up all the trauma. It brings up, runs that fire together, wire together. So when you're in the present doing that, you're sort of calling to these past experiences. And it sounds like some levels of freeze, right? Like locking up, hardening, tightening. It's that. That's the. The shock or freeze response. And so I don't know your. Your herstory, but whatever's in her story, there's going to be pieces in there. And it's hard because the conscious mind is saying, oh, my God, what's happening? What is. This is so weird.
When you can breathe through that and learn how to stay with it, you could actually get what's called flooding, where you will get visuals or somehow you get a sense of knowing, oh, yeah, oh, my God. This was when I was public speaking and I forgot my lines. This is when my dad yelled at me. This is when. And it's all there. And there's an art form not only to learning how to kind of call it to the surface to be cleansed, there's also an art form to clearing it or learning how to let it out. So I'm curious if you feel like you actually got to let it out or whether it was just brought to the surface.
Some of that's dependent on the guidance you were given. Some of that's dependent on your own understanding and sort of. You know, I actually call this work when I work with people privately. It's like learning an internal martial art. You have to learn how to do these. These moves almost right to clear these things.
[00:49:30] Speaker A: I think based on my recollection and kind of thought about it, is I experienced it, but there might still be a little bit in there that needs to be cleared out. It wasn't very clear to me why I was tensing up like that or locking up, but based on what you said and some things from my past, I can see very well. Yes, that kind of freeze thing is in me to just like freeze deer in the headlights.
That. That makes sense and totally tracks.
And oh, my goodness, I literally could talk to you for hours. I mean, it's obviously why you do what you do and do it so, so powerfully. I just want to thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for sharing your heart with the world, for trusting yourself and that inner guidance to do and move in directions that place you where you are at this exact moment, speaking to people like me in an encouraging, uplifting, way.
Jesse, you are just amazing. Let everybody know one last time where they can find you.
[00:50:46] Speaker B: Thank you, Janice. That's so, so kind. I'm taking your words in. And we're mirrors for each other, so it takes awesomeness to see awesomeness in others. So I reflect it back to you and say thank you as well for all you're doing and giving us a platform to have these deep talks. Thank you so much. And anyone wants to keep in touch with Dr. Jesse, you can find
[email protected] as well as tracking Lead With Heart, new show on NOW Media airing on Wednesdays starting last week.
[00:51:16] Speaker A: Let's go, everybody. Make it an amazing, amazing day.
And remember to do that work, the personal development work. It is so worth it.
